Gold Bar: The Town Of The Cursed

We have all heard of Bigfoot in this small mountain town. But have any of you heard about the Curse Of Gold? The Gold Bar curse is a little known story in this day and age. The curse was put on the town by “Chief Sultan” of Sultan, Wa. Most in this town think that the noises they hear are just animals in the woods or the legendary bigfoot, but infact it’s something worse….

This monster has been called many things by the locals in Gold Bar such as “Skin Walker”, “Mishibizhiw”, and “Bigfoot” but infact another is to blame his name is “Larzgor”. Few have met this beast and lived. But I was lucky enough to meet one member of this community names “John” who informed me that he met this creature and lived. John went on to tell that since the experience he has a terrible time sleeping at night and has taken up drug use to forget about the memories. I begged him to tell me the story of his encounter, I ended up having to give him money for a “8ball” in trade for the story about his encounter. So with a slip of some cash and a needle full of heroin the story begins.

                                                          The Story Of Larzgor.

John was but a young boy maybe around the file3501334931345age of 13 when he met “Larzgor” as he so fondly calls him. He decided to go for a walk in the woods like a lot of people from Gold Bar do. He followed 1st Street all the way down and said he went onto some “private property”.

John insisted this was a normal occurrence in Gold Bar, and “private property” signs were meant for the cops not the locals. I nodded of course because who would want to disagree with a methed out hillbilly. His face was red with anger that I would even doubted such a thing. John insisted I dropped this notion of “privacy” and let him finish his story. So I let him continue with his encounter with this beast.
He told me he walked for half a mile before he started to hear things in the woods. He said it sounded as if it was coming from all sides. A horrible smell of rotten stale water and death soon followed, he insisted that water can go stale and that it stinks horribly. He told me that he felt as if he should of turned around but he kept going out of fear.

Then it appeared a beast like none he had seen before. He said it’s head was large and dog shaped but looked like something out of the sea. He claims it even spoke to him. He told me it spoke in tongues but soon he understood it word fofile0001173358771r word. It was saying, “Do not puff the dragon for the dragon she’ll never be caught”. I’m unsure what this could mean but he looked shaken when he repeated it too me.

I urged him eagerly to keep going, I must of frightened him because he soon fell silent. I then noticedfile000922417003 he nodded off so I took a line and put it under his nose.
I had to cut my interview short because when he awoke, he awoke in a furry. He began to swinging furniture around yelling, “Larzgor!! LARZGOR!!.” I made my way to my car with a new understanding of this town. I shall never shake this experience and I never want to.


15 thoughts on “Gold Bar: The Town Of The Cursed”

  1. This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. I’ve lived in gold bar for 22 years, gone in the woods countless times and never saw that demon you speak of… Way to go taking a “tweaker’s words” over any sober person in this town. Idiot.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You say “idiot” but could you have written this? Did you talk to these people? Get off your fucking high horse. You ignorent piece of shit. You probably have food stamps even though you dont need them, you stupid little bitch. They might be “tweakers” but you are for sure an alcoholic. Grow the fuck up. Dont tell people what they saw. Dumbass Trick. “bitches aint shit but hoes and trick…”


  2. Seriously? This is a beautiful area and all the mountains around us are awesome. Been here 14 years and still very happy here except for Reiter off road closing.


  3. This is one of the weirdest right ups — all I got from the story is that a drug addict told a story, which could be a Hallucination. So, instead of a story about Big Foot it became a story about the druggy in Gold Bar. Was that the intent?


  4. I have lived in Gold Bar since I was 3 and have never heard of this story. I go to the local high school and no one talks about this supposed “curse” or seeing a monsters in the woods. I think you just talked to the local conspiracy theory crazys that live around here or one of the local drug addicts. If you talk to people like me the area is beautiful and to wonderful to be cursed.


  5. It took me all of 4 seconds to realize this was just a joke article, like everything the onion writes. It’s literally tagged at the end of the article with satire. For those of you who aren’t smart enough to know what satirical writing is, I suggest you look it up, and try not to be so damn gullible. Lol. Jeez people.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I cant belive ive stumbled upon this. Im literally shaking as i type this i never thought i would see anything about…IT. I saw it. The thing. I saw it i saw it! Oh god i saw it and no ones ever believed me.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s